Empty Vessel

Life drags on with pleasant little surprises here and there and random bouts of irritation/depression. It's a battle I don't understand and cannot win, I can merely ride each wave, minimalising the crashing and breaking water swamping the boat.

I'm looking to wycombe and everything that's going on there with a romanticly infused tint. Cold Hearts et al seem to be having an awesome time and I really want to get in on this. The other day Tom howe invited me to join the facebook group for Funship 2009 which I am so stoked about, he's such a nice guy and I've always wanted to get to know him better- need to brush up on my skating and I'm thinking about getting a set up for cardiff. I'm basically really looking forward to hanging with everyone on the 'team' and having fun.

Cardiff is such a weird place for me right now- I knew Helen and I had to end but the other day I tried to get some chat going and after pleasantries she basically told me that 'I dont really think we r mates nw u kinda fucked tha up! Dont mean 2 b harsh but i have enough friends who treat me wel. But u can hang out with the boys at mine if they r up 4 tha but dont expect things 2 b the same with us matewise cos it wont b'
wow, what a weird and unnecessary text, well I guess I would say that but I just think that the reaction is a little bit disproportionate. Maybe she wanted me to put in effort- to go round hers with some stupid token gift, whatever, it's in the past and I didn't miss her this week.
Gemma is coming next week so going to lay on a party and try and have my way with her, should be fun but the emotional damage that could be caused to her is going to be interesting. (She broke up with Greg).

In other news Greenland and Miller have left for some average Southern Hemisphere country and I should have gone back to send them off but nobody did and I think that is such a shame.

Saw FOB with Howard last night and had an average time. They were note perfect but we were stuck in a massive crowd for ages and I could see the pit but he was restraining me, I finally got there and it wasn't even good. Remind me not to go to these shitty big gigs which cost too much.